A guy has celery sticking out of one ear, lettuce
out of the other, and a zucchini up his nose.
Jokes about Vegetables
He goes to the doctor and asks him what's wrong.
The doctor tells him, "Well, for one thing, you're
not eating right."
Two elderly ladies happen to meet at the market
after not seeing one another for some time. After
inquiring about each other's health, one of them
asks how the other one's husband is doing.
"Oh, Ted died last week! He went out to the
garden to dig up a cabbage for dinner, had a heart
attack and dropped down dead right there in the
middle of the vegetable patch!"
"Oh, dear! I'm very sorry." replied her friend.
"What did you do?"
"I opened a can of peas instead."