Animal Protection > ALF Foes
A Terrorist Under Every Bush

[Lew Rockwell - opinion]

I'm a law-abiding, middle-class mother and grandmother. But I recently discovered that, according to Bush and the FBI, I may be a "terrorist." This came as quite a shock. It's true that I often speak out against injustice, because I believe a citizen has a responsibility to try and make the world a better place. But I've never participated in a physical protest of any kind, unless wearing a T-shirt with a slogan counts. When the "Million Woman March" was going on, I was home, watching Martha Stewart bake a pie.
Still, I've decided to come clean and just hope the FBI doesn't show up on my doorstep.

I confess. I'm a vegan. I don't eat meat, eggs, dairy products or fish, nor do I purchase animal products of any kind. I don't own a leather sofa, wool sweater, or use cosmetics tested on animals. And I donate money to animal advocacy groups.

There, I've said it!
Step #1. The FBI defines terrorism as "the unlawful use of force or violence against persons or property to intimidate or coerce a government, the civilian population, or any segment thereof, in furtherance of political or social objectives."

Okay, I think I'm safe so far. Admittedly, I've tried to convince "segments of the civilian population" (friends and family) to go along with my "political and social objectives" (vegetarianism, libertarianism, etc.), but I've never used force or coercion against anyone, unless you count "forcing" my teenager to mow the lawn.

Step #2. The FBI has classified extremist animal-rights and environmental groups among the top "domestic terrorist threats" and says they are making them an "investigative priority."
That's Step #4. The same way PETA and the Humane Society do. I've donated money and supported PETA and the Humane Society, both terrorist organizations according to the Bush administration's guilt-by-association logic. And anyone who supports terrorists is as "guilty of terrorism as the terrorists themselves."

If you think this is far-fetched, think again. We're all terrorists, now!

October 16, 2006

Gayle Dean [send her mail] constructs crossword puzzles for all the major media. Her work has appeared in the Washington Post Magazine, the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, Simon & Schuster books, Random House books, and Dell Puzzle Magazines.

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